Thinking inside the box

It's item No. 8828346114. Don't be fooled by knockoffs.

This guy named Bob from Phoenix who listed it claims to have had the idea first, but then eBay, as it tends to do, closed the auction down. After a few others put up their similar listings, this guy put his back up.

ESPN "SportsCenter" made a mention of it, and there were more than 9,000 hits on the item as of Wednesday morning.
From an opening bid of $3.50, it was past $5,500 at mid-morning (the 30th bid), and it's supposed to be up there until a little past 5 p.m. on Friday.

The questions asked by prospective bidders provide the best comic relief.
So far, some have asked:
Q: If I get this helmet, will it protect me from a Chuck Norris round-house kick?
Q: Will this allow me score TDs I didn't score at the goal line, and give my team favor with the referees?
Q: Do you think this helmet could be adapted to hang gliding or even rollerblading, or would it be too cumbersome?
Q: Is this helmet street legal in California?

And our favorite:

Q: Isn't it sad that everyone stole your idea and photograph? It's not funny or mature.
A: Yes, that is pretty sad.

Don't forget: It also costs $5 to ship this this via UPS.

BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

By the way, there are plenty of other Roethisberger stuff on eBay related to this. Of the 1,733 items, here's one from a real fan:

Item No. 8828595122 has "authentic wreck crash souvenier." Starting bid: 1 penny.

Here's part of the listing (with all the typos we could leave):
I AM A TRUE STEELER FAN AND HEARD OF THIS WRECK QUICKLY ON THE AM DIAL FROM THE STEELERS FLAG SHIP RADIO STATION, I DROVE TO THE SITE OF THE INCIDENT WHERE BIG BEN HIT FACE FIRST INTO A VAN AND HIS FACE HIT WINDOW. QUICKLY THINKINGI MADE THE MOST OF THIS INCIDENT AND WENT TO THE LOCAL SANDWHICH SHOP AND BOUGHT A ZIP LOCK BAGGIE AS SHOWN FOR 25 CENTS. I ALSO BOUGHT QUE TIPS TO TAKE SAMPLES (AS SHOWN) FROM THE PAVEMENT AT THE SCENE OF THE CRIME. I SPOKE TOTOW TRUCK DRIVER JOSE LUGO AND DAVID DOMINGUEZ AND THEY LET ME USE THEIR BRUSH AND PAN TO SCOOP UP THESE PIECES. I HAVE ALSO THE SCREW, BLACK TAPE, AND NUT BELONGING TO THE MOTORCYCLE. THEY WILL SOLD WITH THE BAGGIE AND THE QUE TIPS AS SHOWN. THE QUE TIPS HAVE NOT BEEN TOUCHED AND SAMPLES ARE NOW DRY. I ALSO WENT ON MY HANDS AND KNEES IN THE INTERSECTION LOOKING FOR TEETH AND HAIR SAMPLES, BUT NOT FOUND. NOT INCLUDED EITHER. I GOT MORE SAMPLES AND STUFF FROM THE SCENE OF THE CRIME AND I WILL LIST MORE SOON. EVEN THE HALL OF FAME (NFL) CALLED ME TODAY AND IS INTEREST IN WHAT I GOT.
BUYER TO PAY $10 FOR SHIPPING OF ALL COLLECTIBLES. THIS IS A TRUE COLLECTORS ITEMS FOR ANY STEELERS FAN FOR CENTURIES TO COME.

Can't you just imagine this guy typing out the listing while breathing into a bag so he doesn't hyperventilate?
Here's his "CSI: Pittsburgh" photo to prove what he's got:

Another quick thinker has scrambled to get Item No. 7249395622 listed today: The domain address to TOOTHLESBERGER.COM, starting at $499.99, or buy it now for $15,000.
Good luck with that one.

What, him worry?

How about item No. 8828408043: A Roethlisberger "Twist-em" Toy:
It's a 3-inch wind-up toy that has "incredible player likeness."
Like, how he was before Monday? Now that's twisted:

We can't figure out who's making out most with Item No. 8828285868 : For $9.95, you get a decal to put on your car (or motorcycle) wishing Ben a speedy recovery. Maybe "speedy" is the right word to use here.

For our bidding, we'll go with item No. 8828731779, posted just minutes ago. The Ben Roethlisberger Youth Football Helmet.
If this kid is smart enough to use it ...