David Kronke was appointed Mayor of Television after a bloodless coup in 2000. Since then, he has improved infrastructure, championed greater educational opportunities and fought for reforms that have utterly erased corruption and incompetence from the television industry. Since Mr. Kronke has ascended to power, Television is a far better place. Blasphemy comes in many forms
Press Release of the Day comes from the National Geographic Channel, which seeks to titillate viewers with an unlikely subject: Jesus.
The title of its special, “Explorer: Secret Lives of Jesus,� invites all manner of speculation, given the press release’s headline: “A STARTLING VIEW OF THE LIFE OF JESUS,� it proclaims, then asks, “Blasphemy? Hidden Truths?�
Eventually, the hyperbole settles down and thus begins the usual NGC boilerplate about “ancient manuscripts� (stifled yawn) before returning to form, claiming the special “offers a tantalizing glimpse inside the logic behind some of the most bizarre stories ever told about Jesus Christ.� And just in time for Christmas.
Speaking of besmirching the good names of beloved institutions, FX’s upcoming “Dirt,� starring Courteney Cox as a tabloid gossip columnist, features a character named “Don Konkey� that works at the same tabloid. I’m sure that the similarities to Your Mayor’s name are purely coincidental, although I became a little more suspicious when the show’s official website referred to the character as “schizophrenic.� Moreover, the estimable Mr. Konkey sports a goatee and is played by Ian Hart, who played John Lennon in two different movies; once, very long ago, someone (who may have had all manner of extenuating personal problems) told me I kind of sort of resembled John Lennon. Not so coincidental now, is it?
We’ve discussed before how Your Mayor’s good name has been exploited for nefarious gain (or twisted jokes) in the past. But “Dirt� gets one thing terribly wrong: I’ve never worn any headgear that looks like a misbegotten cross between a fedora and a porkpie hat. That’s Matt Drudge.
Meanwhile, while it may not be blasphemy it’s certainly carries quite a whiff: Brilliant But Cancelled’s “Deathwatch: Midseason Edition� continues in the same sort of corporate-synergy shilling it trucked in during the fall season. Sponsored by Bravo, which is part of NBC-Universal, BBC’s Deathwatch lays odds for the upcoming midseason replacement series, decreeing that most NBC shows are shoo-ins for ratings success, with the upcoming sitcom “The Singles Table� sporting odds of 626:1 against cancellation, although NBC has already scaled back on its episode order. (The lone exception: Andy Richter’s comedy “Andy Barker, P.I.,� which is given low odds for survival. How must that make Richter feel, knowing that he’s the one guy his corporate uberlords are willing to shove under the bus?)
Ah, well, at least the site offers solace to those behind “Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip,� “Friday Night Lights� and “30 Rock:� This is the only place they can go on the planet and see, right there in cyberprint, that their shows are “thriving.�
Finally, what is this world coming to when a plot-free hour of supermodels cavorting in undergarments can’t draw a sizable audience? CBS’s Victoria's Secret fashion extravaganza came in last place in its timeslot last night, getting its balconet handed to it with a piddling 6.8 million viewers, a full two million fewer than watched last year. Perhaps Justin Timberlake hasn’t brought sexy back after all.
Comments
Well, Mr. Mayor, there's certainly only one thing you can do with regard to "Dirt": sue the bastards.
As to Justin Timberlake being responsible for bringing sexy back? Pass the barf bag, please. Justin is to sexy as pigs are to flying.
Posted by: Suzy Q | December 6, 2006 3:45 PM