David Kronke was appointed Mayor of Television after a bloodless coup in 2000. Since then, he has improved infrastructure, championed greater educational opportunities and fought for reforms that have utterly erased corruption and incompetence from the television industry. Since Mr. Kronke has ascended to power, Television is a far better place. Catchphrase update
TV Land's 100 Greatest TV Quotes and Catchphrases, which Radar online described as "heavy on quotes your ex-fratboy coworkers beat into your brain for months after their original airings" (and offered a few alternatives of their own), has now released the list in handy countdown form. Three of the Top 10 weren't even scripted by TV writers, apparently a damning commentary on their abilities. Here are the Top 20:
20 Come on down! (Johnny Olson, et al, The Price is Right)
... Into the pits of utter vacuity.
19 Let's get ready to rumble! (Michael Buffer, Various sporting events)
18 Good grief. (Charlie Brown, Peanuts Specials)
17 Hey, hey, hey! (Fat Albert, Fat Albert)
16 Yada, yada, yada... (Seinfeld)
Not that there's anything wrong with that, but didn't "Not that there's anything wrong with that" have a greater cultural significance? Or is TV Land hellbent to celebrate desultory mindlessness?
15 Book 'em, Danno. (Steve McGarrett, Hawaii Five-O)
14 Space, the final frontier… (Capt. Kirk, Star Trek)
Live Long and Prosper, a much better catchphrase, was No. 22, by the way.
13 We are two wild and crazy guys! (Steve Martin and Dan Aykroyd, Saturday Night Live)
12 Dynomite! (J.J., Good Times)
11 Aaay! (Fonzie, Happy Days)
Shouldn't a decent catchphrase include actual words in the English language?
10 I'm not a crook. (Richard Nixon)
The more famous pronouncement, "I am not a crook," was a statement made to editors at the Washington Post. This lesser version came during the televised speech, when he dclared, “people have got to know whether or not their president is a crook. Well, I’m not a crook.�
9 Yabba dabba do! (Fred Flintstone, The Flintstones)
Shouldn't a decent catchphrase include actual words in the English language?
8 Whatchoo talkin' 'bout, Willis? (Arnold Drummond, Diff'rent Strokes)
7 Where's the beef? (Wendy's)
Really? A commercial is No. 7 of all time? Imagine all those TV writers who worked so hard over the years to create clever dialogue, only to be trumped by a 30-second spot for greasy burgers.
6 D'oh! (Homer Simpson, The Simpsons)
Shouldn't a decent catchphrase include actual words in the English language?
(Fun fact: Former LA Daily News TV critic (and current Hollywood Reporter TV critic) Ray Richmond is partially responsible for "D'oh!" When he edited the first guide to the TV show, scripts just referred to a "gutteral" grunt. For purposes of the book, Richmond translated it to "D'oh!" And the sixth-greatest catchphrase of all time was created.)
5 Ask not what your country can do for you... (John F. Kennedy)
4 Baby, you're the greatest. (Ralph Kramden, The Honeymooners)
3 You're fired! (Donald Trump, The Apprentice)
Further proof of Trump's art of the deal: He agrees to appear on the series of specials, TV Land agrees to rank his catchphrase high on their list.
2 One small step for man... (Neil Armstrong)
Curiously, we're now in the middle of a debate as to what Armstrong actually said, as the line was supposed to be "One small step for a man..." But apparently, TV Land is happy with ungrammatic epigrams.
1 Here's Johnny! (Ed McMahon, The Tonight Show)
I'm sure that somewhere, JFK's heart is broken that Ed's simple two-word introduction of another human being beat out his heroic call for altruism for the top spot.
But that's TV Land for you.