Scalpels out at "Grey's Anatomy"

They need to set up a triage unit over at “Grey’s Anatomy;” that, or just get a high-pressure water hose to blast the attitude off cast members.

Where to begin? Well, for starters, everyone’s in a snit over the fact that Kate Walsh got the “GA” spin-off series and they didn’t. "The rest of the cast seemed instantly resentful of [Walsh]. … now they're giving Kate the cold shoulder," a tabloid quotes a blind source. Even Ellen Pompeo, who plays the title character on the show and therefore couldn’t be spun off of her own show, is miffed she wasn’t consulted on the decision.

Are these people that vain and that stupid? There’s no guarantee Walsh’s show will be a success, so she could wind up unemployed next season, and all these poor, sad actors have are jobs on one of the top-rated shows on TV.

And it doesn’t end there. Katherine Heigl, T.R. Knight’s knight in shining armor, has dropped out of contract negotiations with the show, upset that she’s not making as much as the more veteran actors Sandra Oh and Isaiah Washington. Though she may have a point: She starred in the movie “Zyzzyx Road,” a film that earned a whopping 30 bucks in its theatrical release, so she’s clearly a bankable starlet.

* UPDATE: ABC is saying the Heigl story isn't true. (But then, networks aren't exactly known to be paragons of honesty.)

With all that going on, it only makes sense that Washington’d be the one drawing the least negative headlines: The noted homophobe has hired a publicist, and an openly gay one, at that. Took long enough, but well-played, anyway.

Soon, “GA” will be the first series in production where all cast members will have to pass through a metal detector to get on the set. One wonders how bitter and back-biting they’d all be if the show only got so-so ratings.