David Kronke was appointed Mayor of Television after a bloodless coup in 2000. Since then, he has improved infrastructure, championed greater educational opportunities and fought for reforms that have utterly erased corruption and incompetence from the television industry. Since Mr. Kronke has ascended to power, Television is a far better place. What happens in Reno turns up on Comedy Central
After a jaunt to Miami that apparently failed to generate enough box office to keep them in business, “Reno 911!” returns tonight, announcing the first sheriff’s department to affix itself to a corporate sponsor: Hotty’s Restaurant. The squad’s cars boast the restaurants’ pink logo and phone number and the new uniforms have eye-searingly fashionable pink trim; the Miranda warning is even rewritten to plug the restaurant. Of course, with Hotty’s phone number on the squad cars, the restaurant gets calls for the cops; the waitresses deliver the messages to the cops on a leisurely basis: “Help, help, someone’s stabbing me.” Ah, well, one of Reno’s finest sighs, “If it’s important, they’ll call back, probably.”
On the plus side, they get all the hot wings they can cram down their gullets. Oh, wait, that doesn’t work out so well for them, either: After a gustatory feast on the wings, one intrepid and suddenly quite flatulent officer declares, “I feel like I have been gastro-intestinally raped.”
Next week: Christian karaoke. Since both “Reno 911!” and “The Shield” return with new episodes this week, it might’ve been cool to combine Rampart’s sadists and Reno’s oafs in some frenzied, murderous orgy of chaos that would’ve been both funny and frightening. Or maybe not.
- “Reno 911!”: 10:30 tonight; Comedy Central.