John Travolta Shocker!

Slow news day.

That’s the only excuse for infotainment show “Extra’s” breathless Email today; its subject read: “‘EXTRA’ Item: John Travolta on rumors th…”

Well, you think, that could be interesting. Until, that is, the email is opened and the giant headline screams:

“JOHN TRAVOLTA ON RUMORS THAT HE IS NOCTURNAL”

“John Travolta … set the record straight about reports he stays up all night – living a nocturnal life.”

Turns out he does. Well, good to know; that’s all cleared up. But there were “rumors” and “reports” about this?

Perhaps it’s a metaphor of some sort.

Otherwise, what have we got today? Rosie may or may not host “The Price is Right” (that'll be interesting only if she jettisons Bob Barker's "spay or neuter your pet" sign-off in favor of a spiel about rising up against the Bilderberg Group) and a minor scandal with a “Skating with Nitwits” celebrity no one can bring themselves to care about (or, in my case, remember her name).

Unfortunately, “Extra” is constantly sending me irrelevant tripe like this, usually involving someone you hear too much about or someone you don’t want to hear anything about (granted, there’s a fair amount of overlap there). It’s like they’re cyber-stalkers, popping up at random times with motives that aren’t exactly sinister but are disquieting nonetheless … they just want you to remember they’re around.

Swanson! It’s Kristy Swanson, isn’t it? She’s the Buffy no one remembers, right?