David Kronke was appointed Mayor of Television after a bloodless coup in 2000. Since then, he has improved infrastructure, championed greater educational opportunities and fought for reforms that have utterly erased corruption and incompetence from the television industry. Since Mr. Kronke has ascended to power, Television is a far better place. Victoria Beckham’s Mensa application
Yesterday’s phone-press conference with Victoria Beckham, whose move to Los Angeles with soccer-star husband David is being followed with a curious rabidity 'round these parts, made me long for the probing intellectual curiosity displayed in Larry King’s interview with Paris Hilton.
The press conference – to promote her upcoming NBC special “Victoria Beckham: Coming to America” (the network paid her something around $20 million for a projected series, but decided an hour of her was plenty) – was only a half-hour long, and it wouldn’t’ve even gone that long had Posh, after unveiling every thought in her head, not repeated herself repeatedly.
I lost count as to the mentioned that the Beckham Empire has “always loved America,” without really mentioning anything specific about America that they loved. She was similarly vague about L.A., twice noting that one can both surf and ski in sunny Southern California: “There’s so much to do there, the sky’s the limit,” she enthused, though beyond surfing and skiing, she remained mum.
On the subject of the Spice Girls, which is threatening to reunite if its demands that Turkey formally admit to the Armenian Genocide are not met, Ms. Beckham twice noted that the group in its heyday sold 55 million albums and twice insisted that the upcoming reunion tour was all about “giving back to the fans.”
There was one SCOOP! – Posh declared that a Los Angeles Times story mentioning that David had given Victoria a $1.8 million diamond-“encrusted” sex toy was inaccurate.
“It isn't true,” she said. “We do buy each other nice things, but I don't have a diamond-encrusted vibrator.”
But she quickly changed the subject to the possibility of starting a children’s charity: “That’s something we’re very passionate about.”
Another reporter asked where all this misinformation about her comes from. “Oh, you know the media – you’re one of them,” she said, essentially accusing the reporter of being a charlatan hack and a barnacle on the hull of society. I’m not sure what more depressing – that she can’t distinguish the L.A. Times from The Sun or that she thinks it fine to insult a group of journalists to their faces or that the guy posing the question didn’t bother to defend himself.
If Ms. Beckham used the word "passion" once, she must’ve used it 20 times during the press conference. Her clothing and sunglasses lines are “where my real passion is.” “David is so passionate about soccer.” “That’s my passion – my family and fashion.” You get the idea. This, after insisting that she’s a “normal girl;” normal people don’t have “passions,” do they? Don’t they just have “hobbies,” or “something I’m vaguely interested in,” or “something that kills the time,” or “something that pays the bills?”
On the project itself: Two times, she said of “Coming to America,” “This is a documentary more than a reality show.”
And I may be wrong on this, but I believe Ms. Beckham may have broken certain laws of physics in using the words “fun,” “exciting” and “creative” more times than is actually possible in a 30-minute period. Those appear to have been the only three words that occurred to her to use in describing her show, which NBC has thoughtfully seen fit not to provide to critics for review.
“Simon Fuller (who also cooked up the Spice Girls) is my business partner – it was his idea,” she explained. “He’s incredibly creative and has been successful with everything he’s done.” (Translation: If he could make me wealthy and famous, just think what he could do with someone of substance.)
Finally, a moment of honesty: “I’ve had fun doing this. At the end of the day, if people like it, it’s great, and if they don’t, they don’t. I’m not losing any sleep over it.”
The puff-piece version of this will appear Sunday.
Comments
Ok, this is entirely TOO MUCH press on Vicki. She's a vapid, boring stick figure.
Posted by: Suzy Q | July 12, 2007 6:15 PM