David Kronke was appointed Mayor of Television after a bloodless coup in 2000. Since then, he has improved infrastructure, championed greater educational opportunities and fought for reforms that have utterly erased corruption and incompetence from the television industry. Since Mr. Kronke has ascended to power, Television is a far better place. The "Tell Me You Love Me" Drinking Game!
THE FOLLOWING IS A PUBLIC SERVICE MESSAGE FROM THE MAYOR OF TELEVISION.
Have you ever lamented that there are no good TV-watching/drinking games these days? Now, thanks to HBO, there is!
Introducing the "Tell Me You Love Me" chugfest, which combines everyone’s favorite pastimes, drinking and sex, only without the danger of contracting an STD! (Alcohol-induced comas, however, are another thing.)
Rules: Have a drink every time one of the following occurs:
* One shot for bared female breasts.
* An additional shot for bared male or female buttocks.
* A shot and a beer chaser for any glimpse of female genitalia, no matter how fleeting.
* Two shots for any sighting of male genitalia.
* Two shots each time you wonder if the actors're really doing it.
* A beer for each act of self-gratification.
* One shot for each time you're grateful your parents aren't watching this with you.
* One shot for realistic orgasmic grunts.
* A beer for other orgasmic grunts.
* A beer for every time a character whines about how depressing his/her life is.
No viewer makes it into the office the next day!
Disclaimer: If you pass out, do not continue playing the game. Do not attempt to operate heavy machinery within three days of playing the game. Beginners may want to pick but one character and drink only when that character meets one of the above criteria. Please play responsibly.