David Kronke was appointed Mayor of Television after a bloodless coup in 2000. Since then, he has improved infrastructure, championed greater educational opportunities and fought for reforms that have utterly erased corruption and incompetence from the television industry. Since Mr. Kronke has ascended to power, Television is a far better place. Your vote counts
No, not in next year’s Presidential election – Diebold’s already got you covered there – but in Bravo’s big “Make Me A Supermodel” sweepstakes, in which those of you who’ve had your fill whiling away the work hours watching Human Tetris (why isn’t this on Fox already?) can decide which two of six aspiring contestants will appear on yet another upcoming reality show.
And, as some feel with the Presidential campaign, it’s hard to rally around Bravo’s candidates with any real fervor. Our panelists:
Ashlie: “Growing up, she sported large glasses and braces and was in her elementary school's academic team, going on to win best in state on an English exam. Ashlie is a self-described extrovert with a big personality who dreams of traveling the world and having a name that people know.”
Q: DO YOU HAVE A SIGNATURE LOOK? IF SO, WHAT IS IT?
A: I believe that I am more of a chameleon and my face is a pallet that can work for a lot of looks.
Angelica: “Angelica dreams of being a famous model, of opening a little boutique someday, and of buying a gorgeous home for her parents in Europe.”
Q: THE ONE THING ABOUT YOU THAT WOULD SHOCK PEOPLE IS…
A: I have 56 first cousins.
Katy: “Katy grew up in a meager home in Alabama where her grandparents helped raise her, but her humble upbringing allowed her to dream. She describes herself as extremely determined, often traveling four hours a day, four times a week for casting calls.”
Q: THE ONE THING ABOUT YOU THAT WOULD SHOCK PEOPLE IS…
A: I like to speak with a British accent, I love to clean!
Igor: “He is currently forming a band and learning how to become a pro wrestler. … In his words, ‘Life kicks ass.’”
Q: DO YOU HAVE A SIGNATURE LOOK? IF SO, WHAT IS IT?
A: I would consider my signature look to be a rock/European kid from the wrong side of the tracks.
Ben: “A very active person, he runs daily and enjoys playing volleyball and Frisbee with friends.”
Q: WHAT 5 THINGS DO YOU THINK EVERYONE SHOULD HAVE IN HIS/HER CLOSET?
A: Black dress, high heels, ratty jeans, rockband T—shirt, Converse shoes.
Josiah: “He started singing while in a youth group, badly at that, but perfected his vocal skills eventually joining his high school choir.”
Q: WHAT FASHION DO’S AND DON’TS DO YOU LIVE BY?
A: DON’T: Wear flats with a dress.
Uh, OK...
Voting began today and continues through Nov. 26. Good luck with it, and to the participants, please remember: There are no winners. There are no losers. There are only vapid, attention-hungry and self-absorbed chuckleheads foisted into the public eye for our bemusement.