Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Kevlar-Reinforced Hippo Hide
In 1975, songwriter Neil Innes joined the members of Monty Python's Flying Circus onstage in New York and memorably declared: "Ladies and gentlemen, I've suffered for my music. Now it's your turn."
Brady Barr, too, suffers for his art. And now it's our turn, if we can keep from laughing.
Barr's the nutcase herpetologist who, Steve Irwin-like, pointedly blithers headlong into dangerous situations and, when the inevitable happens, screams like a girl and says "I've got a bad, bad bite!" 25 times in two minutes. And that bite came courtesy a python, which lies in Barr's area of expertise. So how's he gonna fare when he mixes it up with hippos?
We discussed "Dangerous Encounters with Brady Barr: Undercover Hippo" upon its initial announcement because the concept was so arrestingly blinkered. And the show does not disappoint (except for all the blah-blah-blah before the final 20 minutes, when finally): Barr gussies himself up in a 200-pound, Kevlar-wrapped hippo outfit hand-smeared with hippo dung and approaches hippos in the wild. There's a reason for this, just nominally convincing, but what's great is the spectacle of Brady in his hippo costume lumbering laboriously and clumsily about like a lush on St. Patrick's Day. (He's tried the same trick in a crocodile costume, too. These decoys recalled another Monty Python reference: The Trojan Rabbit in "Monty Python and the Holy Grail." Apparently hippos and crocs have really bad eyesight.
So much to enjoy: Barr picking up "hippo poo" in his bare hands to smear on his Worst Halloween Costume Ever, then, once inside, opining, "The stench is just overpowering in here ... It's eye-wateringly bad," and coughing and spitting for effect. And you're surprised ... why? (Barr also manages to work the phrase "fecal spraying" into the show for our edification.)
"If that hippo attacks, I'm gonna have to rely on the structural integrity of my suit," Barr intones grimly at one point. Structural integrity is about the only integrity that thing has.
Generally, though, he addresses the audience as if he's speaking to extremely dim children: "I'm in position on the Hippo Highway," "These are the most horrifying live sounds ever heard from any animal," etc. etc. For all this silly behavior and expense, the conclusion is pretty anti-climactic and the only educational tidbit I retained from it is, hippos sure can bite hard.
- "Dangerous Encounters with Brady Barr: Undercover Hippo," 9 p.m. Sunday, National Geographic Channel.

David Kronke was appointed Mayor of Television after a bloodless coup in 2000. Since then, he has improved infrastructure, championed greater educational opportunities and fought for reforms that have utterly erased corruption and incompetence from the television industry. Since Mr. Kronke has ascended to power, Television is a far better place. 

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