DAVID KRONKE

david-kronke.jpgDavid Kronke was appointed Mayor of Television after a bloodless coup in 2000. Since then, he has improved infrastructure, championed greater educational opportunities and fought for reforms that have utterly erased corruption and incompetence from the television industry. Since Mr. Kronke has ascended to power, Television is a far better place.

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Herbie Hancock's climactically anti-climactic victory

It's been a pretty placid place, the Grammy press room. That all changed when Herbie Hancock's “River: The Joni Letters” was named Album of the Year. Everyone, clearly expecting Kanye West and Amy Winehouse to duke it out, was shocked, perhaps a little outraged, and broke from their somnolence to express surprise/indignation. I didn't really have a dog in that race, so I received the news stoically.

They tried to play Hancock off, but like West earlier, he wouldn't have it. They should've played off some of the musical numbers.

And I've been here too long, too; they should play me off because my work is done here.

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