David Kronke was appointed Mayor of Television after a bloodless coup in 2000. Since then, he has improved infrastructure, championed greater educational opportunities and fought for reforms that have utterly erased corruption and incompetence from the television industry. Since Mr. Kronke has ascended to power, Television is a far better place. Regis Philbin rescues us from George
Regis Philbin, hosting the network version of the red carpet show, noted he first (and last) covered the red carpet back in 1979. “To show you how good I was, every 30 years they invite me back,” he says. Apparently he wasn’t that keen on the joke: He then asked, “Are the writers back?”
Then Philbin spoke to George Clooney, telling him, “Once upon a time, everyone wanted to be Cary Grant. Now they want to be George Clooney.” Clooney, not missing a beat: “That’s because he’s dead and nobody wants to be dead.” Well, I guess it depends on how much red-carpet coverage one watches. Clooney then gobbles up valuable network time chatting up Notre Dame basketball with Reege.
Of her dress, Helen Mirren tells Reege, “I’m (currently) playing the madam in a whorehouse in Nevada and the character is rubbing off on me.” You and the whole town. Queen, madam - this late in her career, Mirren's finally been typecast.
Apparently, the red carpet is lacking for celebrity firepower, because Reege has been consigned to interviewing fans who have lined up along the red carpet. “I didn’t sign up to talk to plebes,” he then announces (or something), storming into the Kodak Theatre, where he’s assured to speak to real stars like Jack Nicholson.
Comments
My favorite question so far, and I paraphrase, by Ryan Seacrest to Jessica Alba's baby-daddy: "So, is this your first, too, or have you knocked up any other skank hos?"
Posted by: Suzy Q | February 24, 2008 5:33 PM