Inanity roundup: Nigel Tufnel, US Magazine, "American Idol"

For National Geographic's upcoming documentary, "Stonehenge Decoded," they went to the eminent source for all things Stonehenge: Spinal Tap lead guitarist Nigel Tufnel. Unfortunately, his interview ended up on the cutting-room floor, but at least they posted the outtakes here.

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An almost equally blithering interview (albeit unintentional in this case) with someone whose myopia knows no bounds can be found in ABC's profile of US Magazine's brain trust, in which a pretty blinkered notion of the importance of celebrity and how to best achieve it is laid out in hilariously chilling fashion. Some highlights:

Janice Min, editor: "Those other traditional avenues to determine your fame and popularity [she's referring to making music and starring in films and TV shows - you know, actually having some talent] don't have as much potency as [appearing on] the red carpet these days."

Peter Grossman, photo editor: "The word news means something different to us than other people." Clearly. But, he admits they have their standards: "Britney getting sushi is not a cover story." The idea that he even has to explain this speaks volumes.

Heidi Montag, star of "The Hills," the MTV reality show/paean to superficiality which owes almost all of its popularity to US's never-ending coverage: "I think reality shows are harder than being in a film sometimes."

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Before they crown David Archuleta the new "American Idol" tonight, be aware that your relative lack of interest in this season isn't just some random phenomenon - someone did a whole study on this and scientifically discovered that almost no one cares.