Here’s a suggestion for a special-teams helper.
Q: Is Pete Carroll considering naming any other family members or relatives as coaches?
A: I wish he hired his youngest son, Nate, to coach the kickers and snappers since he was a longsnapper in high school and has experience with the position.
Q: When do you begin writing your daily USC report in the Daily News where we get to find about all the suspensions due to character and academic issues and all the injuries the most overratted coach in football, Chris Carlise, was supposed to prevent?
A: Daily reports start next week when training camp opens.
Q: Which is the most embarrassing recent Song Girl scandal:
A) January 2006 incident where the daughter of the coach was caught on camera cheering for Texas.
B) December 2006 incident where a member of the squad was caught on camera cheering for UCLA.
C) January 2007 incident where a member of the squad (same one in B above) was caught on camera flashing her rear end with a massive “wedgie.”
D) March 2008 to present: Song Girlgate.
E) July 2008 incident where the Facebook account of a member of the squad was hacked and private pictures — which included body piercings and surgically enhanced breasts — were posted all over the internet.
Answer: D. But A, C and E are all a close second.