Who Is Coming Back?

Stanford quarterback Andrew Luck showed up at media day sporting a beard. USC quarterback Matt Barkley was asked what he thought of the look?
“I’m going to show up with a mustache next year,” Barkley said.
Does that mean Barkley will return for his senior season?
“I might send (safety) T.J. McDonald,” Barkley said.
Does that mean McDonald, also a pro prospect, will return for his senior season?
“I don’t know guys, c’mon,” Barkley said.

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    Andrew wants to go incognito, after he learns esteemed Standorf alum, David Wu, is embroiled in, wait for it, a sex scandal. No one can doubt that Standorf prepares their men for future success.

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    Recently it has been shown that the best way to avoid gender-confusion issues among Stanford undergraduates is for the menfolk to grow their beards longer than those of the “women”.

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