A few years ago, an alarming number of celebs starting “wearing Mom to the Oscars.” A sweet thought, but LA.COMfidential says the trend made the extravaganzas look about as glamorous as a Sunday brunch. Perhaps the reason for the family affair is that stars are incapable of finding bathrooms on their own, or introducing themselves to other celebs. Mommy did little things like that (publicists being too busy keeping press at bay). Well, where there’s need there’s opportunity: enter the celebrity escort. It’s not what you think it is, says Movieline’s Hollywood Life magazine.

…a celebrity escort is not, in fact, a hooker, but one of the best-kept secrets in Hollywood—the person assigned by the production to shadow a predetermined star at all times, from the red carpet to the after-party, and get them where they need to go.

Celeb escort Christopher Laslo, who has herded the likes of Carmen Electra, Rosie and Pamela Anderson to events, says the pay is low but there are unexpected perks—like the time a ’70s male pop star offered some extreme relief after a grueling night on the red carpet.

Stars can wave on their own, but they need help with everything else